Saturday, August 6, 2011

Spiritually Hungry

Okay, I know my last post was really short and brief but that's what having a new born, a four year old and moving to a new state will leave you time to do. We've been here a month and a half now and I'm finally starting to feel settled. I've unpacked my last box and hung my last picture. I've enrolled Toby in preschool and soccer and have somewhat got caught up on some work. In the midst of doing all of this however, one thing I have not done was spend time in God's word and find time to myself to feed the spiritual hunger that we all have. Because of that, I have found myself feeling anxious and restless at times and I've noticed I was snacking a lot more. We all know when we eat, it gives us a temporary calm that we've been longing for. Problem is is that it doesn't last and what happens instead is we end up feeling more anxious and then the pounds start to creep on and hence starts the downward spiraling that Satan loves.

During my pregnancy I still tried to just follow the Weighdown guidelines and listen to my body and what it was calling for. Yes, it was harder because there were times when I wasn't hungry and would eat anyway because something would sound really good but overall, I did pretty good and only gained 20 pounds. When I weighed myself a few weeks after giving birth I was back down to where I was when I first got pregnant. Problem is is that I know and recognize that I have started going back to my old habits of eating and snacking, especially when I'm feeling stressed or anxious. Well I'm re-committing again and I'm starting with getting back into God's word and a bible study because I know the only way to start is to try to feed my spiritual, not physical hunger.

So, yesterday Toby was at preschool and Tyce was sleeping and I decided to open my bible and get out my bible study that I had started a few months ago but never finished. Although I've been praying all along, it's the first time in a long time that I really felt like I had quiet time to really just concentrate and spend quality time talking to God. I immediately started feeling Him filling up that hunger in my soul and it felt SO great! I also went through and re-read a lot of my old posts from last year and that really helped to motivate me and it also helped me to realize how much I didn't want to be stuck in my old ways again as well. I got back on the Weighdown message boards to get re-connected with other woman for support and I started reading the Weighdown chronicles again. I also want to re-read the Rise Above book as well. It's so important to stay focused and connected and that was a huge help to me before and I know I need that now more then ever! I want to loose between 40 to 50 pounds and I know this is the only way to do it. My heart and relationship with food needs to continue to change and more important then even the weight loss, I long for an intimate relationship with God, deeper then it's ever been so if anyone is reading this, please pray for me because the road is a long one but one that will be SOOOOOO worth it in the end!

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